i atarted lookiing things up about the poet. i found some good ones to use, but i dont know if they will be easy to link to other things or not yet. i still have to go a little deeper in the marilyn monroe and tinkberbell linkage. i thought that it would be easier to find . im going to try and incorporate some poems and diary entries in to my mystory as well. back to work

mystory production is slow at the moment. i have a lot of ideas however. i just need time to put it all together. i should have time tomorrow. i just have a big test tomorrow morning and six designs need to get done also.

i have a lot of ideas but they are all mostly very personal. i dont know if that is the way to go. im always thinking of new things to put in there, i hope i dont forget most of them. i have been writing most of them down. when i get a chance im going to go through my myspace blogs, journal, and old poems that i wrote. that should give me some more ideas and little clips to include.

ok break time is over

Today is the first day that i started my mystory. i feel so afraid of it.
i know that it will be easy once i get in the flow. i just dont know how to start.
i get ideas throughout the day, but when i get time to put them into action i forget what it was or it doesnt seem as good as i thought it was.
i really like the idea of this project.
im not sure how personal im a going to get yet.

this weekend has been pretty laid back. i like it. yesterday was april fools. i didnt really get anyone because i was home most of the day. chris worked all day as well. i was going to get him by saying i might be pregnant, but i dont think it would have worked because he knows better because if i were it would compared to the second coming of Jesus. the only person i got was my friend Linda. it wasnt anything good. she asked me if she had a hickie and i, of course, responded," o my god it is huge! how are u going to hide it." she started to freak out and thats is when i said "April Fools". it was lame but at least the day of prakes didnt go completely wasted.

i have some school things that need to get done. the end of the semester is coming so that means all of the final projects are. i dont have any finals this semester which is sweet. i guess that is one of the perks for being an art major.

spring is finally starting to show its pretty face lately. it made me question if i really want to go to school for the spring semester. will i want to waste to beautiful days? chris was supposed to go for spring semester too, but he realized that he wont have enough money. instead he is planning on working two jobs. maybe hell buy me lots of stuff over summer :) i can only hope.

im so lazy on the weekends. i think that it is two in the afternoon and im still not dresed yet. i shopuld stop this habit. i waste a lot of day doing this every weekend. im such a bum.

i dont really have a favorite movie.
i like a lot of movies.
im not a picky person so any movie that gets my attention i seem to like.
so im not sure what to write about this.
the first movie that poped in my head was Mr. Mom.
it is safe to say that that is not my favorite movie, it was just on tv two nights ago.
i noticed that that movie was a lot funnier since the last time i saw it.
i get all the grown up jokes that are placed in there more now.
it is like that with a lot of movies that i always watched as a kid.
Airplane, Planes,Trains,and Automobiles, the Great Outdoors, any national lampoons movie.
they are hilarious now because im not a naive child anymore.
wait.... that is kind of depressing. im just another tainted grown up. :(
put i love movies.

i had some ideas about what to write about for my mystory. i forgot it all the next day. i have been doing that lately.

i noticed that a lot of my friends are feeling the same ways that i have been. i guess it is comforting that i can relate to them and that i can help them out. hopefully eventually practice what i preach. it is not that my friends dont help me out with me problems. they try, but the knowledge of that they are just waiting for there turn to talk is a bit misleading. it is hard to really feel comfortable to open up sometimes.

i had kickboxing tonight. i really like it. im in it with my sisters. we are really a lot closer because of it. we really needed something like this.

the weather is finally looking up. im excited.

hopfully im not too late before ms. teacher check the classes blogs. i put it off until i got home from my class so i didnt forget... i almost forgot. :)

with credit to my english teacher

i wanna see something, i feel like i havent seen anything

i totally feel that way. i feel like i always tend to miss out and that people always tend to hold me back. i havnt found who i am as a person because everytime i wanna go somewhere and do something... i cant or something comes up. i want to experience new things and really do what i want to do for once. it has gotten so bad that when i actually get to choose what i want to do, i dont know how. i need someone to make the decisions for me. im lost without someone telling me what to do in my spare time. i am very independent, but i am sheltered from having a lot of fun. i also do the obvious stuff on my own. work, school, pay bills; where is the fun in that.

i really looking forward to NC. because it is somethng totally different for me. i hope everything goes well and that im not getting my hopes up for nothng, like i usually do. i know that this sounds dumb but i really wanna look super good when i go there. good hair, have my body the best it has ever looked, sweet clothes.... i hate the way i look now.

i am also pumped to go to cedar point for my birthday. no matter what, that is for sure going to happen. i hope chris also realizes that he is paying for most of it because i paid for everything on his birthday, and i spent a lot of money when i didnt have any to spend. not to mention that everything was way more expensive because it was super bowl weekend. i hope i dont have all of these unrealistic expectations for my birthday. i really want it to be special because i tried really hard for his birthday. and he knows that.

it just suck that everything costs money.

i have been itching to go to some concerts. chris hasnt really been up for it. im to the point that i will go with anyone who wants to go with me. dont get me wrong, chris would probably go, just it will never be his idea or be that easy to convince him to go. that tends to bum me out sometimes. i wish he liked to get out more like i do. he is a homebody sometimes

i dont have to work until thursday. i really looking forwarad to the time off. i went searching at payless today to hopefully find some cute cheap shoes... no luck. :(

wow im really "emo" right now. maybe it is the weather, or because chris and i had a bad weekend. we are all better now, but i dont think that he had to work very hard for me to forgive him. im such a push over sometimes... ok all of the time. i just forgive easy. one look at those puppy dog eyes and i am butter.... :)

i come home from school and my mom starts yelling at me.... guess what about. that stupid charcoal drawing i had to do and how it is everywhere. i knew that shed flip out over it, and u know what it would be her fault why i get a bad grade in my drawing class because she wont give me a break. she says that it was all over the house. i swear she is making it up. she never seems to ever have anything nice to say to me ever!!! now i have to vaccum because everyone else mess is now mine.. it is all my fault dont u know.

ya know if she would just talk and ask me in a nice way it wouldnt be a problem, but that seems impossible to ask.

well it is the last day of spring break... i didnt get anything done that i wanted to. :( im bummed because originally i wasnt supposed to work today, but some girl asked if i could take her hours so she could have the day off, and like the push over i am, i said yes. i really shouldnt have, i have too much to do still. but hey it is more money.... :/

gotta go to work

back again!!! today wasnt as productive as it was supposed to be.

i had kickboxing today... the teacher was brutal. it was the last class for this session. the next session starts next week.

i was supposed to get my hair done today. it didnt happen. :-( due to complications with boyfriend being tooooooo slow. haha i was overly disappointed. the goal is to get my hair done tomorrow. but who knows it might be the same story.

i actually got to sleep in today. i didnt want to get up at all.

i got things that i still need to get done that i planned on over break.. start and finish drawing and spring cleaning is a must!!!!!

yikes!! these blogs have been sneeking up on me. i dont know how many i am supposed to have this week. i hope i have enough.

spring break!!! it has been pretty good. to be honest i have had better. since all of my friends all ready had their's it has been kinda slow. i have to do a drawing by tuesday and i totally dont feel like doing it.

how about this weather. what a tease. one day it is beautiful and the next day it is crap outside. i think it wants to be spring outside just the weather wont let it. it is a war or something. how that for personification... that was my english term of the day.

hello... it is looking pretty nice outside today, for once. i cant wait for the nice weather to get here. i guess it is supposed to be back to 30 degrees tomorrow. bummer. i almost forgot to keep up with this blogging thing. i basically dont have any homework except some stupid drawing i have to get done.. it seems impossible to do, plus i really dont want to do it. ill be back later

hey im at school. i am supposed to be working hard on my project, so i should get to the points. actualy there is no points EVER to what i write about in here.


the main thing that i have been thinking about today is that i cant wait until it gets nicer outside. the first chance i get i am going to move somewhere warm.. like california. final thing. things have been going good lately with chris and i. i hope i dont mess it up by saying that. it tends to go the opposite way once i come out and say that we have been getting along lately. if that does happen, i am never attempting that again... :) but things have been good, i think it is because we havent been spending that much time with eachother. that is really weird for us. dont get me worng. we still spend every waking moment of free time together, it is just now that i am workng i dont see him as much. he still is looking fo a job. he needs to get one quick. im starting to worry....

hello again. spring break is around the corner, and so is everything that is due. yikes!!!!! speaking of that i better make this quick. i like getting things done and over with. my plan hasnt been working lately.

i just got off work. my feet are tired. ten bucks ill try to get my bf to rub them and he will do it for two sec and get bored and stop. what a meanie!!!

tomorrow is finally thursday. last day for the week. im looking forward to possibly sleeping in this weekend, but siince i started working i have been having to get up early every morning, except sunday.. but sunday doesnt count.... u know that.

ok i gotta go.. my brother needs the computera!! bbye

wow!!!!! project 2 is due next week. i havent even started yet! that isnt normal for me at all. i wish that we had another week. :-( im bummed. i cant wait til spring break even though i am the only one that has it that week. all of my friends have it the week before. i still am excited for it.

i really want it to be summer all ready. north carolina!!! im just excited because i am going somewhere where there is an ocean, and it is warm with my boyfriend. i love being 18 because my parents cant stop me!!!!

ok i better get started on my project!!!

wow!!!!! project 2 is due next week. i havent even started yet! that isnt normal for me at all. i wish that we had another week. :-( im bummed. i cant wait til spring break even though i am the only one that has it that week. all of my friends have it the week before. i still am excited for it.

i really want it to be summer all ready. north carolina!!! im just excited because i am going somewhere where there is an ocean, and it is warm with my boyfriend. i love being 18 because my parents cant stop me!!!!

ok i better get started on my project!!!

i felt really guilty not doing three blogs last week because i reponsed to that picture. it felt really weird... especially since it says that i only h ave 14 instead of 15. i might as well just do an extra one to make it average out. i dunno im dumb.

i really need to take pictures this weekend. im going to. there is a show playing in the city that i plan on taking pictures of, so that should be cool. a good photo opportunity. i cant believe that there is disposable digital cameras out now. that is amazing. i didnt really want to do the city that i am doing for project 2, but it would just beeasier to stay close to home.

erin isnt here today. she never comes on thrusdays. this is her only class, so i dont blame her. i only had this class today too. i dont mind coming to this class. it is very laid back an erin is always entertaining. too bad she isnt here.

monday, monday, monday!!! just another monday. i wish it were sunday! just another manic monday. ok im done...

today is my day off from my new job. now that i finally have a job, the other places that i gave applications to are now calling. figures!!

tonight is a MONdate! i wonder what im going to do. i still dont have any money, so it better be cheap cheap CHEAP. i dont remember if i ever explain MONdates or not. well if i didnt, it is a ritual my friend amanda and her boyfriend and me and my boyfriend have. it is very simple. every monday we have a double date, or just hang out together. i love mondates, and yes i realize that it is very corny.

bye

Happy Valentine's Day!!!!! So far v-day has been pretty good. Chris surprised me this morning with flowers, a heart balloon, a magnet with his picture in it, and v-day socks all on my car! he got me, i wasn't expecting that one. i feel cheap now because i made him presents. i hope he likes them. they arent even that good. last year the homemade gifts he got were awesome. this year is kinda , blah! i wonder if i am getting anything else.....

Today is my first day at my new job. YMCA. i think i am going to like it a lot there. it is very friendly. i just have to get back into work mode. im so used to not having to go to work, i got used to it a little too much. hopefully i can get used to balancing work, school, and social life quickly.

im starving. i smell something upstairs. bye!!

hey... it is the weekend. so far my weekend has been kinda dull, but there is still hope. im not giving up!!! my boyfriend is sitting next to me. he is punching holes into a piece of paper. how exciting!!! it is getting bothersome also.

i have no clue of what to do this weekend, but it has to be something somewhat entertaining. saturday i plan on going snowboarding with my boyfriens's family. hopefully that will be fun.better than it was the first time i went. it started out a disaster, but it ended pretty good. hopefully this trip will stay fun continuously, but part of me doesnt think it will. i hope that i will be proven wrong.

next tuesday is valentine's day. i better get started on making valentine's. to be honest im not in the mood to be very sentimental. i feel that it would be wasted at this point. wow im being very negative right now. i better shake this off before it brings down my entire friday night.

im starting to feel guilty. i didnt go to my design class. i dont like that class though. i would get a lot more work done at home. plus im not that happy today. my boyfriend and i havent been getting along lately. im sure all couples go through their troubles once in a while. this is definetly one of those times. another reason why i didnt go to my last class is because i have a bunch of little things to take care also. i cant wait until the weekend. i am hoping it will be decent. hopefully something that i want to do will get accomplished. i doubt it though. i have been itching to go to a concert. well im out of things to say. bye

hello again! yesterday was my boyfriend's birthday finally. next is valentine's day. he is getting homemade gifts for that occasion, no more money is being spend on him for a while. i should start working on my valentines if i am going to live up to my reputation of craftiness. it is a shame, i just dont have the time like i used to or the money.

i finally got a job. i work at the YMCA in southgate, but i havent been able to start yet. i have to wait until i get trained for the computer software that i will be using. they said that it could be a while, which sucks. i was doing chores around the house for money. i find it funny that when i ask to do chores to get money earlier in the year my mom said NO. my brother asks and she says YES! i made sure that i got to do some too, but not surprisingly, my mom says that she isnt going to pay me as much because i dont do as much as him. which is really stupid. he does a bunch of little things like wash dishes(only two loads a day), vacuum, and sprinkle Comet in the bath tub. i had to dust the whole house and do all of the laundry. i would spend the whole day doing chores, so i couldnt dust everyday because i had school work. plus, how can you dust if there is no dust to dust. so last week when allowance came up, austin got $20 and i got $10. so im not doing chores anymore. i swear my parents hate me.

it is super bowl sunday!! my boyfriends birthday is tomorrow. this weekend i made all of these plans because he said that he wanted to only spend the weekend of his birthday with me, well right now i am at home and he is snowboarding with his brothers ALL DAY. i dont so much care that he is spending the day without me, it is just i asked him if he wanted to do things with his family or friends and he said,"no" all last week i was stressing out about what to do for his birthday to be special. so far thursday was the only day that was about us. friday his brothers wanted to play hockey, and they didnt even go. a whole day wasted on waiting and saturday same thing! we waited all day to see if the snowboard park was going to be open. it wasnt. so today is now taken up. i would have gladly went snowboarding but i dont have the money to go. it was so short notice. so right now im feeling ditched. i feel like he realizes how much i was going to do for his birthday. it all goes unnoticed. as usual. he is being a major birthday brat!!!! im not even excited for his birthday tomorrow. what i have planned will probably get pushed aside anyway. well im going to attempt to go out and do something fun instead of sitting here waiting for him again. i have done that too much. he would never have this much trouble with me and i hope he realizes that.

it is almost the weekend... yay. i am so busy, a lot to do.i cant wait until i get caught up. february has always been a busy month for me. a lot of birthday's and family get-togethers, plus school is in its prime.

this weekend my boyfriend and i are celebrating his birthday. i am so poor right now, i dont know how i am going to be able to do all of things we have planned. it is depressing.

every weekend is full this month. if fact i have to cancel plans with my family in order to take my boyfriend out for his birthday... there is so much that i have to get done!!! i promise ill type more when i am not so busy... gotta go

well another week is here. the weather was rather nice today. the super bowl is almost here... i dont know if am i all that interested in it or not. my sister went the the eminem super bowl party because she knows a lot of people. she has met so many celebrities. im finally starting to catch up to all the homework i got. i still have a couple things to do. i took my first art history test today... it was harder than i was hoping it would be. im kinda bummed about that. this weekend i got further behind because i was studying for that test so much, i hope it was worth and i got a good grade. im going to cut this one short because i have scholarship essays to write.

Finally it is Thursday! NO SCHOOL TOMORROW...yay!!! im still going to get up kinda early so i can get a lot of homework done asap so i at least a day of a guilt free weekend. yeah i know, it seems boring, but thats life.

its weird typing on laptops. im not used to it. i still want one though.. i wish i could get one with my income tax money,but i cant.... well maybe. im like the only left in the class right now. everyone did thier blog entries while the teacher was talking. naughty people. (that sounded retarded)

well im gonna get going... gosh i think we got of class really early.. o no wait... the clock on the laptop is an hour slow. man i lost an hour of my day in less than one minute. i guess yesterday was the saddest day of the year. surprisingly,my day wasn't that bad... hopefully i can keep it up!


bye for now....

here we go another day. homework is piling up and it is making me sad. i wish i went to a community college and got easy work and no homework ever!! no... no i dont, but still. i want some free time.

My boyfriends 20th birthday is coming up, February 6th. my plan was A) take him to a strip club, and he could invite all of his friends, because he has never been to one, B) go see Less Than Jake the day after his birthday, because he likes them. It looks right now, than none of them are going to work. the concert is on a school night so i dont think he'd be up for that.... ill have to talk him into it and he doesnt seem that excited about the stip club idea.... so i dont know. im stumped. but i need to figure somthing out soon. Something good and cheap, because im poor.
why cant it be warm out. i could think of a lot to do for his birthday.

it was so windy today. i almost took flight with my art portfolio. i bet i look like a jackass whenever that thing blows all over the place. Good thing that it only happens... EVERYDAY.

okay, time to work on homework. all im doing is finding ways to avoid it. time to get to business.

hello again.... i have the " i have homework to do blues". i am already looking forward to graduating... a long time from now. i think i am making all the things that i have to get done harder than they have to be. i just need to suck it up and do it! i just really dont feel like it. Where did my motivation go? Why cant it be summer? im so lazy right now. im normally not a prograstinator. (i think i spelled that wrong) im slacking....

i need a job. i had a job interview yesterday. i wont know if i got the job until friday. i dont remember if i mentioned this or not , but my family was planning on going to Disney World during my Spring Break. i knew i wasnt going to be able to go, but i was excited to get the house to myself for a week. Well, i guess they wanna go in October now, even worse. i cant go because of school and i wont get the house to myself on spring break. bummer. no house parties...

i have kickboxing tonight. i hope i'm not too sore tommorrow. i know i will though. hopfully ill have a rocking body by the summer time. wishful thinking.

i really dont want to do my homework.... but it must be done!

yikes!!!! i almost forgot about this whole thing. im bummed that it is already sunday. my weekend was pretty good, but it could have been better. i need one more day to get it to where it would be considered a good weekend, but i dont.

the homework is piling up and i need to get started on trying to win some more scholarships pretty soon. i have been filling scholarship applications out, but winning isnt as easy as it was in high school. they practically hand ot money compared to the ones for college students.i wish i had a laptop, i would get things done so much quicker. maybe i'll get one with my income tax money, but i really shouldn't. it should all go into the bank. how boring is that!!!

i cant wait for the summer. im planning on going to North Carolina with my boyfriends family. my family is planning on going to Diseny World during spring break. i would love to go, but since i am older i have to pay my way, and i dont have that kind of money right now. im trying to focus on being able to go to North Carolina rather than not being able to go to Diseny World. im sure ill have a decent summer either way.

I'm at home right now. i just got off the phone with my boyfriend. he is coming over. im surprised it was so easy for him to offer to come over since the gas prices are so ridiculous. we both aren't working right now. im laid off and he had to quit his last job because it was interferring with school.

i hope college is really worth it. both of my sisters have great jobs and they dont have a college education. i was offered to work with my sister, but id have to drop out of school. i turned it down; i hope that that was smart of me. i would have been making $5oo a week. gosh, thinking about it makes me depressed. college better be worth it.

tuesday was the first day of a kickboxing class i joined with my sisters. its cool because it allows us to bond very well. i never worked out a day in my life until last tuesday. lets just say that i am a little sore, but change the words "a little sore" to "completely in pain!" it is my goal, however, to not be a baby about it. I CAN DO THIS. it really isnt that bad. the main thing i am hoping for is that i get a rocking body before the summer. i guess i'll keep dreaming....

This is the first of many blog entries. Erin next to me is "DONE!" She is very proud of it. She says that is cool and crazy. "Yeaaaaah", replies Erin. Personally I think this blog is pretty neat. It makes me really want a laptop. Not surprisingly, I cant afford it. I am currently out of a job right now. I like not having to go to work everyday, but I am now broke broke broke.

I had a pretty okay weekend. My parents went away for the weekend by themselves, which is the first time this has happened in my lifetime. So my brother and I took advantage of this situation and had people over. We arent that experience with throwing parties, so the night involved charades and playing the card game Spoons. I hope the people that came over had fun. They said that they did, but the could be lieing.

I like Martin Luther King Jr. day. I reall enjoyed having a free day. Okay, well this thing is new so I want to play with it so I am cutting it short. bbye